Women's Counseling Network

Stressed Out?

Feel as though there isn't enough of you to go around? Don't know where to go for relief? Increasingly, the responsibilities of family, job, career lead many women to feelings of exhaustion, frustration and isolation. Feelings of being spread too thin may cause feelings of inadequacy and low self esteem, that one is not doing a good job in either role.

Throughout history, women have focused relief and release through friendship, connection with other women. The conversation over coffee after the kids are off to school, the church bazaar, chit chat over the backyard fence were ways in which women felt and experienced connection with other women, feeling understood and supported. In today's fast?paced world, women are more likely to be consumed with concerns about job performance, career success, arranging day care, getting children to and from school, Dr. appointments and a myriad of other activities.

With little time or energy for establishing and maintaining meaningful, trusted friendships, connections; more and more women develop unhealthy ways of coping with the pressures and isolating effects of today's life style.

The development of unhealthy coping mechanisms usually occurs slowly and insidiously. Relief from fatigue, worry, tension, may be found in an after work drink, a smoke break, a chocolate bar, excessive exercise, or a tranquilizer to take the edge off. Because these substances and activities are effective, they can become habitual. The positive results become self-perpetuating.

Over time the body adapts to the effects of these substances, activities and it requires more and more to obtain the same effect. This is called tolerance. This process is central to the development of an addictive disorder.Because the process usually occurs slowly, quietly, and most often in isolation, many women become trapped, controlled by one or more of these substances of activities. The process can be so insidious that by the time negative consequences such as health problems, relationship and family conflict, financial difficulties, job/career problems are evident, control has already been lost. One is in the grips of an addiction. Women who find themselves in the throws of such addiction face several difficulties: 1) Lack of information about where to go for help, 2) guilt, shame, self?reproach, 3) fears of punitive consequences, i.e., loss of children, relationships, job/career, dignity to name a few.

Addictive disorders are common i.e., approximately 1 in 10 Americans suffer from an addictive disorder. Addiction is treatable. There are many warning signals and methods of helping women determine for themselves whether they have an addictive disorder. Therapy can be a safe, supportive environment in which to regain a sense of mastery over an addictive substance or activity.

If you are struggling with an addiction or wonder whether or not your are developing an addiction, make a healthy choice for yourself and seek professional help.

The Women's Counseling Network offers a choice of competent, sensitive women therapists who understand the needs of women who struggling with these issues.